On The Hash... Marks by Creek

Well, I've decided to scrap putting my top 25 up. Who the hell wants to see a new poll go up on a friday? Good news, is that now I'll have more time to put into my picks (which I desperately need).

For Michigan fans who aren't reading MGOblog, you need to wake up. Here is MGOblog's guide on how to bitch if you're a Michigan fan. This is good help to me, as I have simply been blaming Jim Herrmann the whole time. You know what, my system has been working, and I'm sticking to it. Screw Herrmann. (Yeah... That'll do)

So maybe I was wrong about Arizona State, and I know I was definately wrong about Oregon. But thinking of Derek Hagan lead me to this question: How bad is the senior class of wide receivers as far as the NFL draft is concerned? Let's look at my top 5 senior wideouts:
1. Derek Hagan Arizona St.
2. Demetrius Williams Oregon
3. Jason Avant Michigan
4. Martin Nance Miami (OH)
5. Travis Wilson Oklahoma
See my point? Derek Hagan's stock is dropping, and Martin Nance would probably be number one or two on the board, if not for his knee injury. I wouldn't be suprised to see no receivers in the top 20 next year. But I'm getting ahead of myself, we still have time for someone to blow a high pick on Hank Baskett after the combine.

HE'S GONE!!!

Let's get something straight. This Isn't funny.This is. I'm afraid comedy as I know it is dying before my very eyes. It's a shame. And don't start up with that, "it's so stupid it's funny" shit. It's so stupid, it's STUPID! Leslie Nielson movies are "stupid-funny", Austin Powers movies are "stupid-funny." Andy Milonakis is "stupid-stupid."


Heisman 5 in'05:
1. Reggie Bush RB USC (+)
71car 601yds 8.5ypc 6TD's
13 rec 191 yds 2TD's
This week's projection- 15car 70yds / 4rec 50yds 1TD

2. Matt Leinart QB USC
168.6QBRat 65.1comp% 1646yds 12TD's 3INT's
2 rush TD's
This week's projection- 330yds 3TD's

3. Vince Young QB Texas
162.2QBRat 62.4comp% 1021yds 10TD's 5INT's
65car 355yds 5.5ypc 2TD's
This week's projection- 170yds 2TD's / 65yds

4. Brady Quinn QB Notre Dame (+)
156.3QBRat 65.3comp% 1621yds 13TD's 3INT's
This week's projection- 250yds 1TD

5. Laurence Maroney RB Minnesota (-)
165car 875yds 5.3ypc 7TD's
11rec 131yds 1TD
This week's projection- 33car 140yds 1TD

6. Brian Calhoun RB Wisconsin
7. Maurice Drew RB UCLA (+)
8. Marcus Vick QB Virginia Tech
9. Brodie Croyle QB Alabama
10. Drew Stanton QB Michigan St.
11. LenDale White RB USC (+)
12. Elis Dumervil DE Louisville


Picks:
Last week: 4-12 (Yikes!)
Overrall: 40-48-3

Alabama -13 Ole Miss
Mike Shula & Co. got lucky getting a week off following that Florida game. Normally they would be a perfect candidate for a letdown game (big emotional win, major injury, going on the road against a conference team) but I think that week off is just what the Tide needed. Prothro's injury leaves them down a top playmaker, and their number one threat in the passing game. This injury could kill any "Croyle for Heisman" talk, but not this week. Ole Miss (and their black quarterback... Not that I'm racist, but it just seems out of place... Right? Nevermind.) couldn't even crack 30 against the Citadel, and they may not even break single digits in this one.
Alabama 31 Ole Miss 9

Ohio St. -6.5 Michigan St.
With nightmares of Paul Posluszny still haunting Troy Smith's sleep, It will be up to Ohio State's running game to beat Michigan State. With Mike Hart rushing for over 200 in Michigan State's last game, and Ohio State averaging 171 on the ground, I think OSU has a decent chance of pulling this off. Also, Drew Stanton's due for a bad game, isn't he? I'd look for Ashton Youboty to come up big in this one, and then for me to start screaming "YOUBOTY!!!!" & than laughing like a schoolgirl for hours on end. Ah... football.
Ohio St. 27 Michigan St. 17

Texas Tech -14.5 Kansas St.
Wow, Kansas State's program has fallen out of the public eye faster than MC Hammer. Which brings me to my next point: Let's lay off of Hammer already. As evidenced by the 1st sentence, MC Hammer jokes are no longer funny. In the same way Lorena Bobbit jokes are no longer funny. Don't get me wrong, Hammer's descent from the eye of pop culture is hilarious (especially his attempt to salvage a career at Death Row records.), but as a comedian, to see other comedians fall back on MC Hammer jokes STILL, after 10 or so years, is a bit much. We get it, he has no money, now let's move on. Now Bobby Brown jokes on the other hand... those are still enjoyable.
Texas Tech 38 Kansas St. 21
Same guy? You decide.




Miami -41 Temple
Interesting comment from my buddy Big Jon who attended last weeks 'Canes/Duke game:

"Dude, you can totally see through Miami's pants!"

Needless to say, we have given Jon a week to think about whether or not it was important to point this out.
Miami 52 Temple 2

Penn State +3 Michigan
Here's a rundown of some of Michigan's games this year:
-7 vs Notre Dame L
-3 vs Wisconsin L
+5.5 vs Michigan St. W
-7.5 vs Minnesota L

The lesson? If Michigan is favored, don't pick them! We're finding ways to blow game (seen HERE ). Now we're starting Adams & Harrison at safety. Now if that doesn't sound like the names of two characters in a buddy-cop movie, I don't know what does.
"Adams, what's wrong with you?!? You damn near blew up half the city... Hand in your badge."

We just have to hope the O-line can hold up, and Mike Hart can rip off a couple good runs. I think Michigan wins because of how terrible Michael Robinson is, but I'm picking Penn State to cover. And contrary to popular reports, I am not a JoePa hater. I love the elderly, I think it's cute when they try to do real people things like put in lightbulbs, or coach football teams.
Michigan 14 Penn St. 12

Texas -17 Colorado
I actually don't want to go with Texas here, but I've been burned the last 2 weeks by going against them. You know the old saying: "Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, don't go against Vince Young anymore unless you're absolutely sure they'll lose." Or something like that, I'm not good with sayings.
Texas 27 Colorado 7

California -16 Oregon St.
California is still a good team with a great running game, and I would expect them to come out, get the early lead, and pound it the rest of the way. Just absolutely pound it. Beat it up, I mean in and out, and in and out, and-... Umm... This never happened...
California 37 Oregon St. 17

Florida +6 LSU
Florida looked absolutely terrible against Alabama, but there is no way you're getting me to give 6 points to either team in this game. In games like these, where it's too close to call, just take the points. One thing that bothers me about this game is how much it is being overshadowed by the USC/Notre Dame game. This is a BIG game. The outcome of this game rest soley on the shoulders of Chris Leak. If he's on, I can see this being a hootout type game. If Meyers starts running the option every play however, Florida stands no chance.

(Just so we're clear, I'll be taping this game while I flip between Michigan/Penn St. & USC/Notre Dame. Hey, I am human.)
LSU 27 Florida 23

West Virginia +7 Louisville
I think we all overrated Louisville. This defense (minus Dumerville) isn't nearly as good as I thought it would be. On offense, Brohm still shows flashes of being a great pro player, and Bush has earned the nickname "The Governor" from me in honor of good ol' Jeb. The problem, is that they're too inconsistent I am too afraid to pick them to do anything, like cover a spread. And, I just can't see them winning big in West Virginia. Everything there is conducive to tight games.
Louisville 30 West Virginia 24

Washington St. +5.5 UCLA
Coming off a big win like last weeks against CAL, (in a game where CAL ran all over them) UCLA has to go up against ANOTHER strong running team. Maurice Drew (or is it Jones-Drew? Or just Jones? Hell with it, his name is Maurice) played out of his mind last week, and probably will continue to as long as he keeps getting touches. It just won't be enough to overcome the dreaded letdown game.
Washington State 28 UCLA 25

TCU -23 Army
TCU keeps getting impressive wins. Over Oklahoma most notably, but they also beat BYU in a thriller, and a good Wyoming team last week.
TCU 43 Army 7

Wisconsin (No Line) Minnesota
*While looking up the record for most combined carries in a game* This should be a fun game for anyone who enjoys no completed passes of longer than 30 yards. Calhoun is coming off a monster game (in a loss) and I would expect him to build off that against a suspect Minnesota run defense. Minnesota didn't look that impressive against Michigan, but Wisconin's run defense isn't quite as good as Michigan's and with Greg Eslinger, Mark Stetterstrom, & the rest on that Gopher O-line, Minnesota will be running more than a vibrator at Andy Dick's house. I hear that if Minnesota wins, the Vikings have invited them on a boat trip (roughly 478 Vikings sex boat joke I've made this week.), but even THAT won't be enough.
Wisconsin 41 Minnesota 37

Georgia -16 Vanderbilt
Vandy is back to being Vandy.- nufced
Georgia 38 Vanderbilt 10

Oregon -16 Washington
Thanks to Washington, I now have to eat crow about being wrong as far as Arizona St. is concerned. Oregon is actually a pretty decent team, with Clemens, Whitehead, Williams, & Day (who is not getting many looks in the new spread offense, but still a talent) on offense, and Ngata on defense, this team could be getting the coveted Holiday Bowl spot.
Oregon 31 Washington 13

FSU -7 Virginia
Can FSU really have an undefeated season? Would that go down in history as the worst team to ever go undefeated? They don't even have a quarterback! They need to lose... quickly.
FSU 31 Virginia 17

USC - 12 Notre Dame
HOLY CRAP!!! USC VS NOTRE DAME!!! WEIS VS CARROLL!!!! BRADY VS LEINART!!!! JESUS VS O.J!!!! (ok, maybe we know who wins that last one.) The most hyped contest since David vs Goliath, will turn out to be a disappointing game from the Catholic's perspective. This one won't even be close. One thing I've noticed, is that I haven't seen anybody do the whole "Notre Dame ruined UCLA's win streak in b-ball, so they'll do it to this west coast team" angle taken yet. Although, we did get an awkward Digger Phelps appearance on "1st & 10" today. That was fun.
USC 48 Notre Dame 30

Upset Special (2-4):
Wake Forest +14 Boston College
Take a team that plays up to its opponents (Wake) & a team that hasn't been able to put it all together yet (BC), and I like this one to stay within 14. Wake Forest rushed for over 200 yards against FSU last week. I don't care who you are, that's impressive.
Boston College 24 Wake Forest 16

UN-lock of the week (1-5... really, this is just getting sad):
Auburn -7.5 Arkansas
Since the Georgia Tech game, Auburn has been gaining confidence, and is ready for its explosion back on to the scene. They win and win big this week.
Auburn 51 Arkansas 14