Sunday, January 22, 2006

WETBOAT'S CHAMPIONSHIP FOOTBALL WEEKEND MUSINGS


Practice safe sex at Super Bowl XL.

Da da da da dadada da da da da.....

it's now down to 4 teams, the Steelers, Broncos, Panthers and Seahawks! The question is which of these teams will head into Detroit, and what plotlines will run thick for the next two weeks.

Here are the possible permutations:

Steelers vs Seahawks: The All-Mustache Super Bowl. Cowher vs Holmgren, two of the most veteran coaches in the league. Da Bus vs Shaun. Already, the NFL is salivating at the prospect of Extra-Large Bettis in the "XL" Super Bowl.

Steelers vs Panthers: The All-Wildcard Super Bowl. The first Super Bowl in which both teams started their playoffs as wildcard teams. Befitting this wildcard image, Steve "Stevonne" Smith runs his mouth on Media Day and Da Bus retaliates with a few words of his own.

Broncos vs Seahawks: The All-Unsung Super Bowl. A few years ago, who would've thunk that unsung quarterbacks Matt Hasselbeck and Jake Plummer would be in the big dance? Or that the entire Broncos defensive line used to be the ENTIRE starting line for the Cleveland Brownies the year before? Or that it would actually be SEATTLE in the Super Bowl? Seattle is never associated with championships -- the last one was the Seattle SuperSonics' NBA championship in 1979.

Broncos vs Panthers: The All-Boring Super Bowl. Pitting Denver's no-name offense and defense against the Panther's no-name offense (with the exception of Steve "Stevonne" Smith) and defense. A Super Bowl advertiser's nightmare.

And heeeeeeere's my prediction: The Broncos vs the Seahawks! My sentimental favorite is the Steelers, but they will run out of gas in their tank once they roll into Invesco Field. The Panthers have the guts and the playoff experience to make it difficult for the Seahawks, but the Hawks' home advantage and rainy weather will prevail.

The sad part of this weekend is that I will not be able to see any of these games today. There's a family event going on this weekend, and 20 family members have flown into NYC. I must run off for a bagels and lox breakfast with the clan, and then give them a tour of this great town. So, until then, enjoy the games!

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